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The Day My Mother Had Twins…

I know they will ask why this picture of all pictures, I did it on purpose cos they annoyed me last week. These are my sisters, spenders of my little money. (Photo credit: Ramsey’s gallery)

I have two biological sisters and they’re twins, I had reasons to think about them for the best part of last night because their introduction is few weeks away, my kid sisters are getting married and I honestly don’t know how to feel, you’re asking if I love them that much? Yes I do beyond words.

The day mummy had these annoying creatures, Maxi (my elder brother) and I were playing ludo, it was on the 28th of November, I never told anyone this but watching my mother carrying big tummy about in the house and some of her weird actions which I later learned were pregnancy-induced was difficult for me to live with.

I had great fears and till today, goosebumps hit my skin each time I see a pregnant woman, it’s not a phobia or some turn off, I go all out to care for them to the best of my ability and I really don’t know how I’ll manage when I get married and she gets heavily pregnant… I’m a scared cow.

Mum was always angry at unnecessary things back then when she was carrying the girls, always switching channels and only ate a particular vegetable for months – Water leaf, till date that’s my fav veggies, now you know where the addiction came from.

You could tell that the child/children she was carrying would be troublesome from her pregnancy days, it was also a difficult year for the country, I think there was a nationwide strike at the time, can’t remember that bit but the day she put to bed, Maxi and I were the only ones at home, it was a Monday.

She was groaning in pains but I didn’t understand, Maxi did but he didn’t tell me anything, instead he put all the energy on the ludo game, I think we played draw on the day but the memories of mummy saying “God! My children cannot comprehend” will never leave me.

At some points she couldn’t talk, she gestured to Maxi to bring paper and pen, he did and I was there wondering what was going on, my heart was racing fast to see what she wanted to write, on the paper she wrote “get me mummy Tobi” – Our neighbor…

Maxi told me to get her, he stayed beside mummy, it took me over a decade to realize the fact he couldn’t stand leaving her presence in that state was the reason he sent me… Time tells everything after all and since daddy was at work at the time and there was no mobile phone, he stood in the gap.

Mummy Tobi came and didn’t spend 60 seconds before rushing out, I didn’t understand what was going on, she returned swiftly but with another lady and her husband, in record time they ferried my mother inside Daddy Tobi’s Datsun, to only God knows where.

We resumed our ludo, three hours late, I was at the gate doing what I can’t remember exactly, I saw the Datsun coming, I yelled out to Maxi because I couldn’t see mummy in it, he rushed out to meet me but at that point, the woman in the car with Daddy Tobi already broke the news, my mother had been delivered of a set of female twins.

I was indifferent at first, why girls? Why not two boys so we can continue the tradition of “all boys”? Before I could even mutter any word, our house was filled with people, many of them I never spoke a word to prior to that day, words quickly got to daddy at work and my aunt (Aunty Dasola) that lived with us, they both returned from work earlier than usual.

Watching those girls grow was interesting, people say they look alike but I can’t relate, never seen two people with opposite characters like them before, when you see them unite on something, be very careful because if it doesn’t lead to debit alert, it will lead to apologies.

Fun fact: People think Taiwo is the difficult one because she’s somewhat reticent, but you see the other one that is playful and warm? That’s the witch and people can’t tell because she’s so receptive and adorable, she’s in fact the reason I don’t ever wanna have twins. Let them come one by one abeg.

Taiwo evaluates smartly before asking you for money, she’s even a bit proud, if you say no once, she might not ask you for money again for another year, she would rather suffer in silence, that’s crap but it doesn’t concern me, shey my money will stay in my pocket.

The other one doesn’t care, her middle name should be urgent 2k, there was a time I was at the hospital, and she came with dad and mum to visit me, less than five minutes into the 30minutes visit she was already undressing my Nasco cornflakes, very shameless somebody.

They’re getting married? Wow! How time flies, the little girls of yesterday have grown to become God’s masterpiece, I’m proud as a big brother and as assistant daddy since their father passed away a little over two years ago, Kehinde didn’t cry that day… That girl is a witch.

I love them, to bits but I try to form hard guy if not they will send me back to Ibadan with their needs that come like day and night… Standard.

Amazingrambo.

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